"Thank God she just has a heart problem"

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Written on 12:00 AM by gracefully discovering:

Never in a million years did I think that the words "thank God she just has a heart problem" would come out of my mouth until hubby and I went to see My Sister's Keeper tonight. Aside from the continuous crying from myself and many other movie patrons, this movie put a lot of things in perspective for me. This was a very sad movie- and it was even more sad for me because we are having twin girls and I can't help but to think about how Naomi will have to be her sisters keeper! How even though in the womb...we all consider Nia to be the big sister just because she has been the most dominant...and of course the biggest in weight- I can definitely see Naomi stepping up to be the big sister protector!

From this movie I learned a few things:
1. DO NOT forget about the other kids! In our case...our other newborn baby. Mom (Cameron Diaz) was so focused on keeping her daughter with cancer alive that she completely left the other children to basically fend for themselves. Nick and I talk about making sure we balance out our love and affection for both of our girls all of the time. It is something that we are very aware of and are taking steps to make sure that it doesn't happen. I know that it will be hard because Nia will require so much attention- but we have to make a conscious effort to make Naomi feel just as special and loved. I don't want my girls growing up with self-esteem issues because Mommy didn't show her enough love, attention and affection- NO WAY!!!

2. Although the entire family was dealing and coping with the Cancer- they still appeared to remain close, have fun and take advantage of the time that they had with Kate. They didn't seem to completely let the illness take over their lives...well mom kinda did...but they were still able to have fun and make jokes :)

3. A heart mom that has a grown daughter with HLHS told me that this journey with HLHS can either make or break your marriage...and that we have to decide which one it will be. In this movie- I could clearly see how stressful Kate's Cancer was on her parents marriage. She even knew it and in her book she wrote a note to her dad saying that she was sorry for taking his first love away. I'm praying that this journey that we are about to endure will only bring us closer to one another and allow us to depend on God more than we ever have before. I know that this is going to be tough...but I don't have a doubt in my mind that together we will get through this.

So, tonight I am going to bed with a little more peace than I had before. My daughter will be born in about 55 hours with half of a heart....and will have the first of three open heart surgeries in about 5 or 6 days. We don't know what God has in store for baby Nia- but thank God it's just a heart problem!

Next week this time my girls will be here!

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Written on 11:26 AM by gracefully discovering:

Wow! It's been over a month since I've blogged...but I'm baaaccckk! I think that I will be blogging frequently, or at least have my friend Candace blog for me so that I can keep you all updated on the girls and Nia's surgery and recovery process.

We have exactly 7 days before our little ladies are welcomed into this world. My scheduled c-section date is June 30, 2009 at 7:30am. Knowing the exact date and time eases up some of the anxiety- but there is still enough of it there to freak me out just a little bit! I was telling my girlfriend that I have every range of emotions that one could think of these days. I am very excited, happy, anxious, scared, nervous, overwhelmed, full of joy and peace...all at the same time! I never thought that was possible...but I'm here to tell you that it is.
In exactly one week, my life as I know it today will be over! I'm looking forward to the changes- although some of them will be very difficult- I'm thinking that they will be totally worth it when I am able to look into the eyes of the two people that I have carried for 9 months.

Are we ready??? Physically ABSOLUTELY! The house is completely ready for them to come home! They have everything that they need, and their room is the cutest baby room that I have ever seen in my life (and of course I'm biased...so just accept it!).

Mentally...I'm still working on that! I keep telling myself that I'll be ready by the 30th...but truthfully, I don't think anyone is ever mentally ready to have two newborn babies and one baby with a serious heart defect that will need open heart surgery the first week of her life! But what I do know is that we have a great support system and we have God on our side who is going to provide us with the strength and peace to get through this journey that we are about the endure!

The countdown begins today. 7 days.

Here are some pictures of the girls nursery that daddy worked so hard on! This man loves his girls..I'm telling you!